Monday 27 May 2024

Beauty is in the heart of the beholder.....

''Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder'', so it's been said.

During my late teenage years I was mad about cinema.
I don't mean ''movies'', I am talking about films, the one's
more often than not in black and white, and with subtitles.
Films that bewildered, intrigued, mystified, excited
and entertained, but always teased my perception of
what I thought I knew about life and myself.
My two last years of secondary school(gymnasium)
I spent mostly at the Cinematheque in Stockholm
rather than at school.
The Cinematheque was both a ''film school'' and an
exceptionally large ''movie theater''
with at least six films showing in one of the many
theaters at the same time.
It also had a cafeteria and a posh restaurant,
plus a really good shop with film posters, t-shirts
and a lot of nick-nacks.
The coffee in the café was not all that good,
but the films always were.

As a cineaste(lover of cinema) the Cinematheque was my
absolute favorite place to be.
Movies(blockbusters etc.) didn't really excite me,
but ''cinema'' did.
Whether they were Black and white, silent, subtitled,
French, Italian, Russian, German, etc. etc. I loved them all.
Sucking on a cold, stale coffee for hours I would
sit through film after film and eventually emerge
as the day would come to a close.

Among the hundreds of films I watched was a film
titled ''Freaks''.
''Freaks'' is a black and white film made in America in 1932 
and is basically about a traveling circus with a variety of acts
including a ''sideshow of curiosities''. 
Meaning people with
unusual physical attributes such as no limbs,
 pinheads, conjoined twins, a bearded lady,
and many other ''curiosities''.
Besides being a black and white masterpiece 
and the photography stunning, it was a very challenging
film to watch. 
Why? It challenges the viewers perception of many 
concepts: what is beauty? what makes a human being
worthy? do we love with our eyes or with our hearts?
why do some of us find it hard to accept rather than judge
people with unusual physical attributes?
The impression the film made on me has never left me.

Many years later my biases and prejudices was once
again challenged when I watched a film titled
''The Elephant Man'' directed by David Lynch and
starring John Hurt.
The biographical film is based on the life of John Merrick,
a severely disfigured man who lived in London in the late
19th century.
Though at first one may experience John Merrick
as a ''monster'', the more we get to know him as the 
film progresses, we discover that behind 
 the ''monstrous façade'' is a gentle, kind,
and a highly sophisticated and intelligent man.
By the time the film ends, I'm going to suggest that
 John Merrick has transformed from
being ''the Elephant man'', a curiosity with multiple
disfigurations, an ''animal'', and has instead become a human 
being with an extraordinary ability to turn a blind eye to
other people's biases and prejudices.

Some say that human beings often deem people and
things beautiful according to symmetry.
Symmetry creates patterns and patterns are important
for us because it helps us to organize and categorize
(order)how we perceive the world we live in.
Presented with a choice between an imperfect/
disfigured/asymmetrical object and a perfect one,
according to those in the know, 99% of the time we
will choose the perfectly symmetrical object. 

Some suggest that if we deem someone as ''ugly/
unattractive'' we often tend to assume that they
are therefore ''ugly/ unattractive on the inside.
Here's the thing though: ''Ugly, like beauty, is in the eyes
of the beholder'' methinks.
Now, more so than ever, methinks that what something
 or someone looks like have become more important 
than its or someone's content/character.
However.....
This means that many people are rejected every day 
by someone just swiping ''left''.
It also means that many lonely people are ignored 
every day because they are viewed as not good 
looking/attractive enough to talk to.
How many kids are excluded from the ''cool/inn group
every day because they are not ''cool looking'' enough?
How many jobseekers are rejected every day because
they are not attractive enough to warrant an interview?
And so on. I'm sure you can think of a lot of
other examples.

A few days ago a very dear friend of mine died
un-expectantly.
Maybe many would view him as an ordinary
looking man, but to me and my son he was an
extraordinary, kind, gentle, interesting, generous
 and beautiful man.
Perhaps if we can learn to ignore our biases and
prejudices and instead take the time to get to 
know people,
we may discover that it really is true that
''one cannot judge a book/person by its cover''.

''People are like stain-glass windows.
They sparkle and shine when the sun is out,
but when the darkness sets in,
their true beauty is revealed only if there
is a light from within.''
(Elisabeth Kubler-Ross


''Beauty is in the heart of the beholder.''
(H. G. Wells)


about the image: Acrylic on large canvas
Title: ''Beauty is in the heart of the beholder.''

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