Wednesday 22 May 2024

Judging a person by his/her ''shell'' can be very problematic......


During the mid-90's a book with the title ''Men are from
Mars, Women are from Venus'' blazed its way onto the
literary scene.
In the book the author John Gray states that most
common relationship problems between men and women 
are due to fundamental psychological differences
between the sexes i.e. ''Men are from Mars,
 women from Venus''.
Placing men and women on different ''planets'' he
then goes on to explain and categorize the cognitive and
behaviour differences (as he views them) and why
those differences can cause much misunderstanding.
Some viewed the book as very insightful/helpful 
then (maybe some still do) but a ''new study published
in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology
has revealed that men and women are categorically
the same''.
Personally, I found John Gray's book troubling.
I don't believe in the notion of stereotyping human
beings according to gender.
I believe that the culture, society, norms, traditions,
relationships, ideologies and belief-systems we are
exposed to play a far more important role.
Human psychology is complex and not always
easy to get ''one's head around'', stereotyping on the
other hand, is far easier. 
-Well, what did you expect? Men are from Mars.
-Well, what did you expect? Women are from Venus.

Relationships, may I suggest, thrive when we communicate with 
each other effectively, openly, compassionately and honestly.
After I finished reading ''Men are from Mars, women from Venus''
I decided to start paying attention to what kind of bias/gender
stereotyping I could notice in advertising.
I know, I know, advertising's aim is to reach a ''target'' market.
 What I wanted to find out was: besides trying to reach the
''target market'', was it also pushing a gender biased agenda?
This, I discovered is a huge rabbit hole, so I will just touch
on it for now.
I believe that men, women, and LGBTQIA+ care about cars, furniture,
vacuum cleaners, kitchen appliances, clothes, schools,
beds, food, cooking, painting, D.I.Y, fuel consumption,
etc. etc. etc.
I believe that men, women and LGBTQIA care about their appearance,
 their physical and mental health, and how they are perceived 
by others.
I believe that men, women and LGBTQIA care about financial, 
environmental, and physical security.
In short, I believe that inherent in human beings is
a desire and a need to belong, and none of us come
from neither Mars nor Venus, we are all
earthlings.


When we stereotype each other we disconnect
ourselves from that which we all have in common:
our humanity.

''Only by not judging something by the shell 
in which it lives are pearls a possibility.''
(Citizen Z)


Betty Davis, the painting above, is regarded as one 
of Hollywood's finest actresses, however, she is also
viewed as having been highly combative and
 confrontational.

''Until you are know in my profession
as a monster, you're not a star.''
(Betty Davis)

A genuine pearl, wouldn't you agree?


about the image: acrylic on large water color paper
Some editing in Elements.

 

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