We are what we think....on the power of thoughts

"We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts we make the world." (Buddha)

As a child I was one of those kids who used to wonder about basically everything. (Truth be told, I am still a person who wonders about everything..)

What is the mind, where do thoughts come from, why does music affect us so much, where, how and when, did "energy" begin, why do some people choose to be mean to others, what is dying, is there something beyond the universe , etc.etc.

It seemed to me that for every answer to a question I found, a new question lurked.

One of the questions that has been with me all my life is: what exactly are thoughts and how do we know we have them?

This may seem a silly question perhaps, but is it? Can a thought be had without using words for instance? Can it be seen on an fMRI machine? A "conscious" thought; as in, we are aware of thinking it,... according to some, before it reached our conscious, it had to go through brain processes in our unconscious to generate that thought. Yeah, I know, ...say what?

Thinking, having thoughts, something we all do non-stop whether we are conscious of doing so or not, ....exactly how we do so to this day has science flummoxed.

(Although it is possible to experience feelings, sensations and impressions without the use of language, language sure makes it easier to make sense of and understand those experiences.)

We think with thoughts, thoughts are mostly made up of words, and words can perhaps be viewed as the  "cipher" we use to make thoughts "real".

After having had a two day binge of "Criminal Minds" recently... my mind has been percolating just how powerful our thoughts can be, how they can at times create our very own "invisible prisons" that can prevent us from being able to live and appreciate our lives fully. 

Thoughts are an integral part of the human experience and we have thousands of them every day. Most of them we are not aware of, some of them we are, yet whether we are aware of them or not, they affect us in many different ways.
Thoughts of a life-affirming and positive variety can assist us to feel more emotionally capable to deal with life's up's and downs than thoughts of a negative and "what's the point" variety.
Situation: Wow, this is a challenge! Thought: I have dealt with challenges before, I am sure I'll be able to deal with this one too. Feeling: Confidence/self-assurance.
or
Situation: Wow, this is a challenge!  Thought: How am I supposed to figure this one out on my own?   Feeling: Lack of confidence/feelings of self-doubt.
This process is so fast that unless we ask ourselves why we feel the way we do and then backtrack to the thoughts we had before we had our feelings, chances are that we may not even recognize the link between our thoughts and our feelings.

         "It began when Teddy was eight and he was told by one of his teachers that he was stupid. 

The class had laughed at him and in the breaks some of the other children kept calling him stupid. Being just a small teddy he didn't know how to deal with it, how to fend himself against it, how to prevent it from taking root in his subconscious. (The first "bar" in his invisible prison) When Teddy's best friend suddenly no longer wanted to spend any time with him and at school ignored him, Teddy felt betrayed and confused and concluded that people can't be trusted. (The second bar in his invisible prison.)

         When Teddy's first love broke off their relationship without giving him any reason for doing so, he concluded that love hurts and that feelings can't be trusted. (The third bar in his invisible prison)

Living in his first share-house with friends Teddy discovered that friends can lie, steal, and cheat without any compunction. (The fourth bar in his invisible prison)

        As the years rolled by, Teddy did the best he could to cope with whatever life threw his way and so more bars were added to his invisible prison. But he didn't do so well because those bars (that he was not even really aware of) interfered with his view of the world and its inhabitants. 

                He struggled with thoughts that told him that he was stupid, that people can't be trusted, that love is painful and unpredictable, that people calling themselves friends are capable of lying, stealing, and cheating, and that he, somehow just wasn't "good enough". However, every now and then Teddy would catch a glimpse of his "bars" and  when he did, he would try to exchange the thoughts that imprisoned him for thoughts that would free him. Because as time passed, he had come to understand that with your thoughts you create your world."

Research into the "placebo effect" has shown just how powerful our thoughts are, even to the extent that in some cases some patients suffering with incurable diseases have been cured using placebo medication or treatments. You know the phrase: "It's all in your mind"...well, very often it is.

What thoughts may pass through our subconscious/unconscious we have little control over, but we do have quite a bit of control over our conscious thoughts, but,... whether we want to exercise that power or not, is up to each of us.

As a person who deals with nasty flashbacks every now and then, I do understand that sometimes one can become overwhelmed and feel utterly powerless in the face of an episode, but as luck would have it, I have a very accomplished and compassionate psychologist that I see who has given me a very useful "tool" to deal with those episodes. (The reason I am bringing this up is that in my view, a flashback is an example of a "wordless" experience grabbing hold of the mind, so even if there were thoughts proceeding the feelings, one would be hard pressed to be able to identify them.)

Just as we can exchange thoughts that affect us negatively, we can also exchange images that do so.

My psychologist told me: "When you have a nasty image (flashback) show up, exchange it for a positive image anchored in the "NOW", because the flashbacks belong to the past and life is lived in the now."

Most in the know would agree that it is our thoughts that lead to our emotions/feelings, and our feelings motivate our actions, and the actions we take will either have the desired outcome or not.

(Change the thoughts and the feelings change, changed feelings often lead to changed actions, and changed actions changes the outcomes.)

I often have a coffee somewhere after I have finished my grocery shopping, and while I drink my coffee I observe people and how they interact. On one such an occasion, a family of four sat down at a table next to me. For the whole half hour I sat there, I did not hear one kind word spoken by the father to his family.......all I could hear were words weaponized by anger. I wondered what kind of thoughts his words would give birth to in his family......

"We are shaped by our thoughts; we become what we think. When the mind is pure, joy follows like a shadow that never leaves."  (Buddha)