Monday 17 July 2017

If a fly on the wall could speak.......

 "Oh, I'd love to be a fly on the wall for that...."....a common expression. What if flies could read and write and write down their observations in a book for us to read?
What would be their observations of human beings?

"Testaments according to the Flies On The Wall", entry 342617, as observed by Buzz.

Humans, when in groups, often behave differently then when they are alone, and when there is a multitude of them congregated, it can be difficult to ascertain what the outcome of such will be.
These are my observations of five different human groupings.

Sports. Human beings take this very seriously, so seriously that at times sports arenas can become "battle fields". I have observed occasions when the mood of a crowd has rapidly changed from an atmosphere of joy and conviviality, to that of anger and seething hostility in the blink of an eye. My observation is that humans don't like their teams(tribe) to lose, they seem to invest so much of their own emotions into their teams that they take it very personally when or if, their teams lose. I have also observed that this seems to happen mostly when teams are involved, when the sport involves individuals competing, this seems not to be the case. 
School yards. My observation of school yards is that they too can be likened to "battle fields". There are different "tribes" and each tribe seem to have very specific rules as to what is acceptable or not in order to belong to each tribe. Taste in clothes and music, length and style of hair, interests and social background/status, seem to be very important for each tribe. These tribes seem to keep their distance from each other although occasionally there seem to be altercations between them. Note worthy here is that in the school yard, there often seem to be individuals who don't seem to belong to a tribe but spend their free time at school on their own. If this is by choice or not, I don't know.
Interest groups. My observation of Interest groups is that it consists of a group of humans who together seek to change something, they share goals and aspirations, and often seem to support and encourage each other. For this group, taste in clothes and music, length and style of hair, social background and or status seems to be of little importance. What seems to be important, judging by  my observations, seem to be to be both a strong individual and a "team" member.
A Mob. My observation of a mob, is that a mob is a congregation/crowd of humans who are discontent with something and gather together to voice their opinion. My observation is that discontent is what seems to motivate and drive mobs. Often rioting, looting, property damage and other forms of destruction, follow in its wake.

Humans seem to prefer to belong to one or another kind of group, but the most important group of them all, seem to be the one they call "family".
I have saved my observations of this group to be the last of my observations, because this seem to me to be the most mystifying and complicated of the groups I observed.
There seem to be many configurations of what humans call a family but the most common seem to be: a mother figure, a father figure, and one or more children.
My observation of different families is that there seem to be quite distinctive roles that applies to a family's dynamics: the adult humans (mother/father figures) are the decision makers, and the children are to go along with the decisions until they are deemed as "adults".
I observed families in which the driving force seemed to be love and tenderness, mutual respect and togetherness. And that togetherness seemed to be reinforced every time the family members congregated. Although the parents were the decision makers, they took the time to listen to their children's wishes.
I also observed families in which there seemed to be little togetherness, rather, each member seemed to do their "own thing" (a common human expression) and if they congregated, it seemed as if it was
more by accident than by choice. The parents were the decision makers and their decisions were non-negotiable, regardless of any protestations by the children.
The dynamics within the different kinds of families were at times perplexing, and among the most perplexing, were the "machine" families, and with "machine" I mean families who seemed to be run like "well-oiled machines". Every member in this kind of family had a very specific role to fill, each one had a specific schedule to follow, each one had specific tasks to be performed each day, each one had expectations to fulfill, like cogs in a machine each one of them had to stick to their specifications or the machine would stop working.
If the dynamics in a "machine" family are very specific, in a "dysfunctional" family, (and this seems to be a rather common kind of family grouping) the opposite seem to be the case. My observation of a dysfunctional family is that in a dysfunctional family, boundaries seem to often be ignored and or dis-respected, there is often conflict, misunderstanding, and a lack of togetherness in this kind of family grouping. Often one (or two) of the family members will take on the role of trying to hold the family together by being the peace keeper(s),  but more often than not, this seems to be at the detriment of that member's own well-being.
As an observer, it is hard to really understand this need humans seem to have of belonging, because even though they seem to put much value in belonging, they also seem to put much value in being separate, self-sufficient, and highly functioning individuals. As an observer, I can't help but wonder if it could not be possible for humans to be both; and with that I mean; to be a separate, highly functioning individual, who also belongs to a family and or a group?
I have observed individuals who behave one way in his/her family group, and totally different in another group setting. I have observed humans who seem to find strength in their own company, but who seem to have trouble with fitting in with a group. I have observed humans who seem to struggle with their own company but gain strength from being a part of a group.

Conclusion: Human groupings are very complex, and hard to understand. Human beings are very complex, and hard to understand, and yet, there is no denying, .....observing the human species is something I find highly entertaining. It is an enigmatic species, wrapped in a coat of mystery, and more often than not, stuck in it's self-made paradox.
Buzz

1 comment:

  1. What an insightful little buzzing fly - it sure seems to have traveled a lot and seen much. I especially enjoyed the observations on heterogeneous as opposed to more homogeneous groups - the ones regarding families seemed to be coming from a human rather than a clever fly. Actually, it would have been nice to see how the fly compares human groups to her own - if it thinks that flies do have a stronger sense of belonging...that would make the comments sound more authentic rather than slightly anthropomorphized.

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