And then The Beatles came along and changed everything.........

The Beatles.

For many years there was one item on top of my Christmas

wish list: The Beatles latest album.

What was so special about The Beatles?

A lot. 

The lyrics, the harmonies, the beautifully crafted

melodies, the depth and quality of their compositions,

and their bravery and willingness of crossing existing and 

assumed musical boundaries.

For some of us music is just, well,....music. 

We either like what we hear or we don't, and more

often than not, we decide so very quickly.

Our judgement is more often than not based purely on taste and

 on whether we connect with the music or not.

Most of us don't ask ourselves why we like or

dislike different kinds of music, we just ''know''.

''I don't like jazz/classical/rock/blues/country etc.

etc. music.''

''Why? What don't you like about it?''

''It's not my thing, I know what I like and that's the

music I listen to.''

According to Spotify, there are over 1.300 different

genres(category/type) of music in the world.

(Well, today,....tomorrow there may be 1.301.)

In the early sixties, which is when The Beatles first sprang

forth, there were a lot less genres of music and a lot more resistance

to ''new'' music then there is today.

Music? You call that music???!!

That's not music!! Frank Sinatra, Duke Ellington, Mozart,

Beethoven, now that's music!!! 

Why, those guys with their long hair and screeching guitars

don't even know how to play properly!!!

Comments containing words similar to the above

has probably been tossed about ever since ''organized'' music 

was invented.

Organized as in defining pitch, rules for harmonic and melodic

structures, forms and tonalities.

Once we figured out how to notate and then later record music however,

 music started to ''travel'', it became possible to hear music from

most parts of the globe.

Composers, song writers and musicians, began to incorporate

different elements of the music they heard into

their own music.

 Introducing different sounding scales, harmonies,

melodies and rhythms. Even at times learning how to

play instruments they had never seen or heard before such as

tabla drums, sitars, pan flutes etc. etc.

The first pop release(allegedly) to feature sitar (a stringed instrument

related to the lute family popular in India) was ''Norwegian Wood'',

a track on the album ''Rubber Soul'' by The Beatles, released

in December 1965. 

On every album that The Beatles released until they broke up

in April 1970, they managed through extraordinary creativity

and imagination to come up with new ideas.

Not only musically and lyrically, but also technically.

They introduced using feedback loops, psychedelic sounds,

playing sounds in reverse, randomly taping together cut pieces

of tape and more. 

Commonly The Beatles is regarded as

the foremost and most influential band in popular

music history. Not only did they influence the music

industry, they also influenced the cultural and social

revolution in the 1960's.

Although music perhaps for many of us may primarily be

something we use to work out to, dance to, relax with,

have in the background, set the mood with, put

children to bed with, etc. etc. it can be so much more than

that if we let it.

Music is a language that needs no translation, it ''expresses

that which cannot be said and on which it is

impossible to remain silent.'' (Victor Hugo)

''You can't love music without loving The Beatles.''

(Nick Cannon)

''The Beatles blew the walls down for everybody else.''

(Barack Obama)

''The Beatles completely turned the world upside down.''

(Phil Collins)

about the image: acrylic on large canvas

The American Geisha.......

(Now, before you assume that this is a pro or against

America post, let me assure you that it is neither. 

Merely some observations of mine made during

and after spending some time there. Five months.)

From the minute I heard Bessie Smith bellow out

''Give me a pig foot and a bottle of beer'' I knew that

when I grew up I wanted to be a Jazz pianist.

(Considering that I was only three years old when I 

made that decision, one may wonder what on

earth a Swedish toddler could possibly have connected

with listening to Jazz.)

Fast forward some 30 years and I am stepping off a plane

 in Atlanta, Georgia. Through circumstances, hard work and some luck

I have been invited to perform at a huge Music festival 

in Birmingham, Alabama.

Verna, a friend of the family picks me up in Atlanta and

we drive to Birmingham. Once in her little flat, situated in

the heart of Birmingham, jetlag kicks in and I zonk out

on the bed she has prepared for me.

16 hours later, I wake up. Verna is gone, but she has left

a note telling me she is at work.

I decide to go exploring.

Observation 1: Birmingham in the summer is just as

relentlessly hot and humid as it is in Queensland, Australia.

Observation 2: What Americans call ''coffee'' seems to

be what I would call ''coffee flavoured hot water''.

Observation 3: Generally people are friendly and polite, although

their southern drawl do take some getting used to. But

I find it smooth and very musical, I really like it.

Observation 4: Finding any kind of food without any sugar in it

proves a very difficult task. There is even sugar in most breads!!

No wonder there is an obesity problem in this country.

Observation 5: Every kind of ''space'' is air-conditioned.

Arctic winds greet me where ever I go.

I can't help but wonder how much energy is expended

on keeping those air-cons going all the time.

Observation 6: There seems to be an endless array of fast-food

outlets. Fatty foods, deep-fried foods, ribs soaked in sweet

sauces, steaks the size of dinner plates, chips in buckets,

and soft drinks....oh man, more like tubs than cups.

Observation 7: Being a vegetarian in Birmingham one

has to be prepared to do some serious research if one

wants to have a choice of salads or non-sugared, non-sauce

 drenched healthy meals. 

Observation 8: Cars are very clearly the choice of transport.

Everything seemingly can be done while remaining seated 

in the car. Even ATM banking. 

Observation 9: ''Big'' seems to be the operative word.

Big people, big portions, big illusions, big problems,

big dreams, big ideas, big opportunities, big difference between

the have and have-nots, the cities and the suburbs, etc. etc.

Observation 10: Winning, or being a winner, seems to be at

the pinnacle of achievement, the driving motivation behind

most actions, although, winning often seems to be measured in 

dollars more than anything else..

Observation 11: Addictions of all varying kinds seems to

have got its teeth into a large number of Americans, but

it seems perhaps that food-addiction may be the most

insidious one of them all. 

Wandering around in a T.J. Max store in Birmingham

I quickly realized that one way of deluding people of

their ''real'' size is to change the sizing parameters.

What used to be Large, call that Small. 

(Trying on a pair of so called ''Small'' jeans in the

shop I discovered the ruse and found that I needed

xx-Small.)

Observation 12: America is an enigma. It seems to me

paradoxical. So much of the best, so much of the worst,

so much hope, so much despair, so many super rich,

so many super poor, so much creativity, so much 

conformity, so much corruption, so much courage,

and the list goes on.

Finally, in my very personal view, regardless of 

its pluses and minuses, I believe this planet is better off

with a USA than without. 

Though it may be stumbling to live up to the Bill of Rights

and their Constitution, USA gave birth to Blues and Jazz music,

and without that music, would there be any rock, pop, rap, trap, 

Jazz, fusion, etc. etc. music today?

''What is my definition of Jazz?

Safe sex of the highest order.''

(Kurt Vonnegut)

about the painting: Acrylic on large canvas.

Why is it called American Geisha?

This rather large American woman believes in magic; 

the wand in her hand. She believes that no matter her

size she is still a princess; the tiara on her head.

Dancing is for everyone no matter the size; the ''tutu''.

Her face is beautiful; the geisha mask represents timeless

beauty.

The American Flag wings held on her back by rhinestones; 

She is an American Dreamer.

The little mammal who brought down mankind.........

Some time ago I watched a documentary that step

by step hypothetically illustrated what would become

of earth if humans were removed from it.

According to the documentary, 10.000 years from now

it is possible (so Weisman suggests) that all that

 may remain as evidence of human kind having inhabited

 planet Earth, may be remnants of constructions made from stone.

Are we perhaps to conclude from this that earth would be ''better

off'' without human beings?

Yes? No? Well, how could we know if none of us would be

on earth to observe and record events?

From a human perspective, we have come up with some

cracking ideas and achievements, I mean, the list

is very long indeed, but let us not fool ourselves, 

there is also a very long list of catastrophic and

devastatingly damaging ''achievements'' perpetrated

by us.

All our achievements whether good and bad have

come at a cost, and now and then through history

we have been reminded that powerful as we may be,

we are not really in charge of this planet,

we just think we are.

One of those reminders is: Deadly Infectious Diseases.

Deadly infectious diseases such as the Bubonic Plague, 

Smallpox, Yellow fever, The Flu, HIV, Ebola, etc. etc.

are serious reminders of how quickly we can be brought

to our knees by an enemy that can only be seen through

a microscope. It does not care about who we are, what

language we speak, what religion or belief system we 

adhere to, what our social status or the hue of our skin is.

But worst of all perhaps, is that this enemy is able to

mutate, to transform itself into a new kind of virus (Covid19)

should mankind manage to come up with an ''antidote/vaccine''

that kills the original virus.

We battle on.

Another reminder: Nature.

Bushfires, erupting volcanoes, droughts, floods, cyclones,

tornadoes, earth-quakes, etc. etc.

In as much as we can prepare, follow progress with satellites,

make predictions, assumptions, graphs and so on, we

are not in charge of exactly when and where these events will actually

take place.

On the way home from a gig I was once caught up in a mini-cyclone.

Luckily for me, my small car was full of my music equipment

which made it heavier than usual. The freeway was bumper to bumper

and I was moving forward at snail pace until the traffic stopped

altogether. I had heard somewhere that the thing to do was

to open all windows and let the wind blow through, so

that's what I did. It seemed to work because the car stopped

''hovering'' although it got pretty wet I must say.

Looking through the windscreen I saw trees, and a lot

of debris fly by, actually.... even a caravan!

I can't remember how long I was stuck on the freeway bridge

but I was mighty glad when the mini-cyclone eventually passed.

And another reminder: Space

Solar flares, asteroids, the sun expanding, gamma ray bursts,

super nova explosions, falling space junk, holes in the

ozone layer etc. etc.

These events we have little control over.

We may explore space, but in my view, we are not in charge of it,

ipso facto, we are not really in charge of earth and what happens to it.

Only certain aspects.

''A human being is part of the whole called by us Universe,

a part limited in time and space.

He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something

separated from the rest, a kind of optical delusion of his

consciousness.

This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to

our personal desires and to affection for a few persons

nearest to us.

Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison

by widening our circle of compassion to embrace

all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty.''

(Albert Einstein)

about the image: ink pen on paper, edited in Photoshop.

The thought behind it is how the Bubonic Plague was

supposed to be spread by rats, although I did draw a mouse

instead. (I like mice better than rats)

The trouble with feelings...........

Since I began this blog seven or eight years ago, I have posted a new

''bit'' every Monday. Until the last few weeks that is. Though some

 may suggest that the possibility that I could run out of things to say, 

stories to tell, or just prattle on is near impossible, alas, the impossible

has become possible.

Two weeks ago my father died.

Some may prefer to use the terms ''slipped away, ''passed on'', ''crossed over'', 

or some other fancy euphemisms for ''died'', but for me the word died works fine.

He was buried last Friday at a small funeral attended by his closest and

dearest. There was music, a lot of flowers, a slide show and some very 

thoughtful and sincere speeches.

Standing outside the chapel and watching the hearse drive away,

a friend of the family came up to me, put his arms around me and

asked: How do you feel? 

Feel? Good question. What was I feeling?

I had no clue, but I needed to answer so I took the easy way out and

answered: Sad. 

My father's death was not un-expected, nor was it gentle, nay,

rather the opposite. According to the doctors and nurses who

looked after him through his last four weeks, my

father was angry and adversarial until his very last breath.

''Rage, rage against the dying of the light...'' Dylan Thomas penned

years ago and my father obviously heeded those words.

Before my father's body was transferred to the morgue my family

was given the opportunity to say a last farewell.

My last visits with my father (when he was still alive) had been very difficult.

Though barely more than skin and bones, he was still able 

to yell insults at me and order me about.

The nurses and my mother tried to comfort me by telling me:

 ''Don't take it to heart what he says, he doesn't really mean it.''

(I tried to heed their words, but I didn't always succeed.)

Nonetheless, I did decide to say a last goodbye.

Arms around each other's shoulders, my mother and I entered

my father's room for the last time. The room was still, peaceful,

and softly lit by a few rays of sunlight forcing their way through the almost

drawn blinds. 

My father looked at peace. Gone was the anger, pain and fear.

I placed my hand on his forehead and said a few soothing words.

After arrangements had been organized with the staff, I left the hospital.

Driving home from the hospital I tried to decipher my feelings.

I felt tired, my eyes were smarting, I felt as if I had a lump in my throat,

but mostly, I felt bewildered and numb.

Now, a week since the funeral, I am still struggling with getting

to the core of what I am feeling. Feelings, it seems to me,

 can be extremely confounding and perplex.

(Much like a Rubik's cube my mind keeps twisting and

turning, trying to line up the colors(feelings) so I can

name them. 

Yellow= melancholy, blue=sadness, red=anger,

and so on.

However, there are supposedly 43 quintillion possible

configurations on a Rubik's cube which leads me to wonder:

Is it the same with feelings?)

Is it possible to experience feelings without actually being

able to give them a ''proper'' name? 

Like: I feel like a matchbox floating on the open

ocean, or I feel like a soggy log in a roaring fire, or I feel like pearl in

 an oyster shell, or I feel like a car with no brakes, or I feel like

an open wound, or I feel like a blade of grass trying to push

my way through newly laid asphalt, or I feel

like a nebulous cloud, etc. etc.........

How am I feeling? 

The question seems to have become a bit of

 a conundrum for me.  Knowing just how large the

list of ''feeling'' words is and having used many of them

on many occasions, this perplexes me.

Is it perhaps possible to become ''verbally constipated''?

(As in; trying as hard as you can, you just can't find any words

that properly defines/describes/identifies what you are feeling.)

The closest I seem to be able to describe what I am feeling is:

I feel like: the Second movement of Rachmaninov's Piano

Concerto in C Minor, I feel like: ''Blue in Green'' by Miles Davis,

I feel like: ''Almost Blue'' with Chet Baker and Bill Evans.

Often we simplify or perhaps one could say condense complex

feelings in to ''easy access'' terms: I feel sad, I feel happy, I feel good,

I feel bad, I feel lonely, I feel scared, I feel safe, etc. etc.

In my experience however, useful as those terms are, they can

also be quite limiting.

When my brother died I felt as if the sun

 was never going to come out again. 

When my closest friend died I felt as if

 a corner of my heart was gone forever. 

When my best friend died I felt as if

flowers lost their fragrance, music lost

its purpose and words lost their meaning.

How do I feel at the death of my father?

I feel like: the Second movement of Rachmaninov's Piano

Concerto in C Minor, I feel like: ''Blue in Green'' by Miles Davis,

I feel like: ''Almost Blue'' with Chet Baker and Bill Evans.

about the painting: acrylic on large canvas

(for the purpose of the blog I added a little bit

of editing in photoshop for the frame and text.)